Hexagram 31
Influence (Wooing)
咸 (Xián)
Lake over Mountain
Hexagram 31 represents the power of mutual attraction and influence between complementary forces. This hexagram symbolizes the natural magnetism that draws people together, particularly in romantic relationships, but also in all forms of meaningful connection. The image shows the youngest son below the youngest daughter, representing courtship, receptivity, and the gentle yet profound influence that arises when two beings open themselves to each other with sincerity and without force or manipulation.
Key Concepts
The Judgment (卦辞)
Translation: "Influence. Success. Perseverance furthers. To take a maiden to wife brings good fortune."
Hexagram 31 teaches the profound principle of influence through receptivity rather than force. The hexagram's name, Xián, originally meant "all" or "universal," suggesting that true influence touches every part of our being. In human relationships, the most powerful connections arise not from aggressive pursuit but from genuine openness and mutual receptivity. When we approach others with an empty mind and open heart, free from selfish motives or manipulative intentions, we create the conditions for authentic influence to flow naturally between us. This hexagram particularly emphasizes the courtship dynamic, where attraction develops through sincere interest, patient attention, and respectful engagement rather than through pressure or demands.
The reference to taking a wife symbolizes the formation of lasting unions built on mutual attraction and complementary qualities. In the I Ching tradition, marriage represents the harmonious joining of yang and yin principles, creating something greater than either individual alone. Success comes through maintaining proper attitudes: remaining humble, staying receptive to the other person's nature, and allowing the relationship to develop at its own pace. Perseverance here means consistency in one's sincerity and openness, not stubborn insistence on outcomes. When influence is mutual and freely given, relationships flourish naturally and bring lasting joy to all involved.
The Image (大象传)
君子以虚受人。
Translation: "A lake on the mountain: the image of Influence. Thus the superior person encourages people to approach him by his readiness to receive them."
The image of a lake resting upon a mountain creates a powerful symbol of receptivity and influence. The mountain, solid and still, represents inner strength and stability, while the lake above represents openness, reflection, and the capacity to receive. Water naturally seeks the lowest places, and the lake on the mountain's summit shows how elevation and humility can coexist. The superior person embodies this principle by maintaining inner strength while remaining completely open to others. This emptiness is not weakness but rather the highest form of strength—the ability to receive others fully without prejudice, preconception, or selfish agenda. When we approach relationships with this quality of receptive emptiness, we create space for genuine connection and mutual influence.
By cultivating inner stillness like the mountain and outer receptivity like the lake, we become naturally attractive to others. People are drawn to those who truly listen, who receive them without judgment, and who respond with authenticity. This hexagram teaches that the most profound influence we can have on others comes not from what we say or do to them, but from the quality of presence we offer. When we empty ourselves of ego and agenda, we become like a clear mirror that reflects others back to themselves, allowing them to see their own truth more clearly and feel genuinely understood.
The Six Lines (六爻)
Six at the Beginning (初六)
Bottom line - Yin
"The influence shows itself in the big toe."
This line represents the first stirrings of attraction or influence, felt only as a subtle impulse. Like a slight movement in the big toe, the feeling is present but not yet significant enough to act upon. You may sense a connection or opportunity beginning to form, but it remains in the realm of possibility rather than reality. This is a time for awareness without action. Notice the impulse, acknowledge the attraction, but do not yet commit to movement. Premature action based on such faint signals often leads to missteps. Wait for clearer signs before proceeding.
Six in the Second Place (六二)
Second line - Yin
"The influence shows itself in the calves of the legs. Misfortune. Tarrying brings good fortune."
The calves represent impulsive movement—the urge to follow every attraction immediately without reflection. This line warns against hasty responses to feelings of influence or attraction. If you act on every impulse, rushing toward whatever draws you, misfortune follows. The calves want to move whenever the feet move, but wisdom requires discernment. Instead, remain in your place and allow the situation to develop further. By staying centered and not chasing after every attractive possibility, you maintain your dignity and allow genuine connections to reveal themselves naturally over time.
Nine in the Third Place (九三)
Third line - Yang
"The influence shows itself in the thighs. Holds to that which follows him. To continue is humiliating."
The thighs move only when the whole body moves, representing the tendency to follow others rather than maintaining your own center. This line warns against losing yourself in relationships or allowing attraction to override your better judgment. When you hold too tightly to those who attract you, or when you follow every influence without discrimination, you lose your independence and self-respect. The result is humiliation and regret. Maintain your own ground even while remaining open to influence. True connection requires two whole individuals, not one person dissolving into another.
Nine in the Fourth Place (九四)
Fourth line - Yang
"Perseverance brings good fortune. Remorse disappears. If a man is agitated in mind, and his thoughts go hither and thither, only those friends on whom he fixes his conscious thoughts will follow him."
This line addresses the heart and mind, the seat of conscious intention. When your thoughts scatter in all directions, chasing every attraction and possibility, you influence no one deeply. True influence requires focused intention and steady presence. If you remain constant in your values and clear in your purpose, you naturally attract those who resonate with your authentic self. Scattered energy produces scattered results. By cultivating inner stillness and directing your attention consciously rather than reactively, you create meaningful connections with those who truly align with your path and purpose.
Nine in the Fifth Place (九五)
Fifth line - Yang
"The influence shows itself in the back of the neck. No remorse."
The back of the neck represents unconscious influence—the subtle effects we have on others through our presence and character rather than through deliberate action. This is the highest form of influence, where you affect others simply by being who you are, without intention to persuade or manipulate. At this level, there is no remorse because there is no selfish motive. You remain true to yourself, and your authenticity naturally influences those around you. This line suggests that you have achieved a level of integrity where your influence flows naturally and beneficially without conscious effort or concern for results.
Six at the Top (上六)
Top line - Yin
"The influence shows itself in the jaws, cheeks, and tongue."
This line represents influence through words alone—talking about connection rather than embodying it. When influence remains only in speech, in the mouth and tongue, it lacks substance and depth. You may talk eloquently about your feelings or intentions, but words without corresponding action or genuine inner transformation remain superficial. This is the weakest form of influence, often indicating that the connection exists more in imagination than in reality. True influence must be rooted in the heart and expressed through consistent action, not merely through persuasive speech or charming conversation.
Love & Relationships (爱情)
In matters of the heart, hexagram 31 represents the ideal conditions for romance to blossom naturally through mutual attraction and genuine connection. This is an exceptionally favorable time for courtship, new relationships, and deepening existing bonds. The key to success lies in approaching love with an open heart and empty mind, free from desperate need or manipulative strategies. Allow attraction to develop organically by being authentically yourself and remaining receptive to the other person's true nature. When both individuals maintain their integrity while opening themselves to mutual influence, a beautiful relationship unfolds naturally, like a flower opening to the sun.
For those seeking love, this hexagram counsels patience and receptivity rather than aggressive pursuit. Make yourself available and approachable, cultivate your own inner qualities, and trust that the right person will be naturally drawn to your authentic presence. In existing relationships, this is an excellent time to deepen intimacy by truly listening to your partner, receiving them without judgment, and allowing yourself to be influenced by their perspective and needs. The strongest relationships are built on mutual influence where both partners grow and evolve through their connection with each other.
The hexagram warns against common pitfalls in romance: moving too quickly based on superficial attraction, losing yourself in the relationship, or relying on words alone without genuine emotional depth. True love requires maintaining your own center while remaining open to your partner. Practice the art of receptive presence—being fully present with your beloved without agenda or expectation. When you influence each other through authentic presence rather than through manipulation or neediness, your relationship becomes a source of mutual growth, joy, and lasting fulfillment for both partners.
Career & Business (事业)
Professionally, hexagram 31 emphasizes the power of influence through receptivity, collaboration, and genuine connection with colleagues, clients, and partners. Success in your career now depends less on aggressive self-promotion and more on your ability to listen deeply, understand others' needs, and respond with authenticity and skill. This is an excellent time to build professional relationships, form partnerships, and create networks based on mutual benefit and respect. Your influence grows not through dominating conversations or pushing your agenda, but through demonstrating genuine interest in others and offering real value through your expertise and presence.
For those in leadership positions, this hexagram teaches that the most effective leaders influence through receptivity and example rather than through commands and control. Create an environment where team members feel heard and valued, and they will naturally align with your vision and goals. In business negotiations or sales, focus on understanding the other party's true needs and finding solutions that benefit everyone involved. Partnerships formed under this hexagram's influence have excellent potential for success because they are built on genuine mutual attraction and complementary strengths rather than on mere convenience or opportunism.
The hexagram cautions against scattered efforts and superficial networking that lacks genuine connection. Quality of relationships matters far more than quantity. Invest your time and energy in building deep, authentic professional connections with people who truly resonate with your values and vision. Avoid the temptation to chase every opportunity or try to influence everyone you meet. Instead, focus on being excellent at what you do, maintaining your integrity, and allowing your reputation and results to attract the right opportunities and collaborators naturally to you over time.
Health & Wellness (健康)
In health matters, hexagram 31 emphasizes the profound connection between mind and body, and the importance of receptivity to your body's signals and needs. This is a time to develop greater sensitivity to what your body is telling you through sensations, energy levels, and subtle symptoms. Rather than imposing rigid health regimens from external sources, listen deeply to your own physical wisdom and respond with appropriate care and attention. Your body knows what it needs for healing and balance; your task is to become receptive enough to hear its messages and wise enough to respond appropriately with rest, movement, nutrition, or medical attention as needed.
This hexagram also highlights the influence of relationships and emotional connections on physical health. Stress from relationship conflicts or loneliness from lack of connection can manifest as physical symptoms and illness. Conversely, supportive relationships and genuine emotional connections contribute powerfully to healing and vitality. Pay attention to how different people and environments affect your energy and well-being. Seek out relationships and situations that leave you feeling energized and balanced, and minimize exposure to those that drain or disturb you. Your emotional and social health directly influences your physical condition.
For those dealing with health challenges, this hexagram counsels receptivity to healing influences from various sources—conventional medicine, alternative therapies, supportive relationships, and your own inner healing wisdom. Remain open to what genuinely helps while maintaining discernment about what doesn't serve your healing. The body responds powerfully to gentle, consistent care given with attention and respect. Avoid forcing healing through aggressive interventions unless absolutely necessary. Instead, support your body's natural healing processes through proper rest, nutrition, stress reduction, and maintaining positive emotional connections that nourish your spirit and strengthen your vital energy.
Financial Matters (财运)
Financially, hexagram 31 indicates opportunities arising through relationships, partnerships, and your ability to influence others through genuine value and trustworthiness. This is a favorable time for collaborative ventures, joint investments, and business partnerships where mutual benefit and complementary skills create success for all involved. Money flows more easily when you focus on building authentic relationships and providing real value rather than on aggressive sales tactics or manipulative strategies. Your financial success now depends significantly on your reputation, the quality of your professional relationships, and your ability to attract opportunities through the strength of your character and competence.
This hexagram suggests that financial growth comes through receptivity to opportunities that align with your values and skills rather than through chasing every possible income source. Be selective about the financial opportunities you pursue, choosing those that feel like a natural fit and that involve people you genuinely trust and respect. Partnerships and collaborations formed now have strong potential for financial success if they are based on mutual attraction to a shared vision and complementary contributions rather than on mere opportunism. Invest in relationships and networks that can provide ongoing value and opportunities over time.
The hexagram warns against financial decisions driven by superficial attraction to quick profits or by following others without proper discernment. Maintain your own financial center and make decisions based on solid analysis and alignment with your long-term goals, even while remaining open to input and influence from trusted advisors. Avoid scattered investments or impulsive financial moves based on emotional attraction alone. Instead, build wealth steadily through consistent value creation, wise partnerships, and maintaining the kind of integrity and competence that naturally attracts financial opportunities and resources to you.
Personal Growth (个人成长)
Hexagram 31 offers profound teachings for personal development, emphasizing the cultivation of receptivity, openness, and the capacity for genuine connection as essential spiritual qualities. Personal growth now comes through learning to empty yourself of preconceptions, judgments, and ego-driven agendas so that you can receive life and others more fully. This practice of receptive emptiness is not passive but requires great inner strength and self-awareness. As you develop this capacity, you become more sensitive to subtle influences, more capable of deep connection, and more able to influence others positively through your authentic presence rather than through force or manipulation.
This is an excellent time to work on relationship skills, emotional intelligence, and the ability to truly listen and understand others. Personal growth happens significantly through our interactions with others, as they mirror back to us our own patterns, blind spots, and potentials. Remain open to being influenced and changed by your relationships while maintaining your core integrity and values. The superior person allows themselves to be touched and moved by others without losing their center. Practice this balance of openness and stability in all your interactions, and you will grow in wisdom, compassion, and effectiveness.
The hexagram also invites you to examine how you influence others and how you respond to influence. Are you manipulative or authentic in your interactions? Do you try to force your will on others or do you trust in the power of genuine presence and example? Do you follow others blindly or maintain your own discernment while remaining open to wisdom from all sources? By cultivating authentic influence—the kind that flows naturally from integrity, competence, and genuine care for others—you develop into a person who naturally attracts positive opportunities, relationships, and experiences while contributing meaningfully to the lives of those around you.
Timing & Advice (时机与建议)
The timing associated with hexagram 31 is highly favorable for initiating new relationships, forming partnerships, and opening yourself to mutual influence and connection. This is a period when the universe supports authentic encounters and meaningful bonds. Take advantage of this energy by making yourself available and approachable, attending social and professional gatherings, and being genuinely present with the people you meet. Opportunities for significant connections—romantic, professional, or spiritual—are more likely to appear now. The key is to remain receptive and authentic rather than forcing or manipulating outcomes. Trust that the right people and situations will be naturally attracted to your genuine presence.
The primary advice of this hexagram is to cultivate receptivity and emptiness as your approach to all situations and relationships. Empty yourself of preconceptions, agendas, and selfish motives so that you can receive others and situations as they truly are. This receptive emptiness is the source of genuine influence and connection. Practice deep listening, remain open to being changed by your experiences and relationships, and trust in the power of authentic presence over manipulation or force. When you approach life with this quality of openness, you naturally attract what you need and influence others positively through the integrity of your being.
At the same time, maintain your own center and discernment. Receptivity does not mean losing yourself or following every influence indiscriminately. Like the mountain supporting the lake, maintain inner stability and strength while remaining outwardly open and receptive. Be selective about which influences you allow to affect you deeply, and maintain your core values and integrity even as you remain flexible and open to growth. The superior person influences through example and authentic presence, not through words alone or superficial charm. Focus on being genuinely excellent in your character and competence, and trust that this will naturally attract the right opportunities, relationships, and success to you.